From the beginning to the end, sorry for the inconvenience.
1961 Born, Oakland California - fifth generation Californian 1968 Attended first Oakland Raiders football game: Raiders 13 - Buffalo 10 1977 Saw Led Zeppelin’s last North American concert appearance 1978 Bought first car, a 1969 Dodge Charger ($600) Joined a gang, The Nomadz 1980 Graduated Las Lomas High School, Walnut Creek California 1980-1984  BS Physics, UC San Diego, cum laude o Started using e-mail o Met Miles Dylan o Had long hair, didn't wear shoes o 1982 Attended Birmingham University, England 1984-1990  PhD Physics, UC Santa Barbara o Was not awarded the Nobel Prize in Physics 1985-1990  Worked on the TPC/Two-Gamma experiment at the Stanford Linear Accelerator Center 1985 Married Heather’s mom “what a great party, I knew everyone and they all liked me" 1985 Held a baby for the first time, Heather L Stephens 1986 Joined UC Santa Barbara's Particle Physics Group 1989  Named the James Chadwick Scholar of the Ettore Majarana International School for Subnuclear Physics, Erice, Sicily, Italy 1990  Discovered the R(1525), a particle created in theinteraction of a nearly-real and a quite-virtual photon 1990-1993 Postdoctoral Research Assistant, University of Florida o Performed the world’s most accurate measurements of rare decays of bottom-quarks o Was shot in the chest while riding bike to work - they wanted $600 to take the pellett out... it’s still there, 6th rib down on the right. 1991-1993 Worked on the CLEO experiment at Cornell University 1993  Professor of Physics, University of Texas at Arlington 1990-1999 Worked on the D-Zero experiment at Fermi National Accelerator Lab o Was on the team that discovered the top quark 1995 Bought a goofy looking house in Mansfield Texas o Saw an ad in the Fort Worth Star-Telegram for free German Wire-Haired Pointer puppies, brought home my Uncle Sherman o Presented results on the top-quark discovery in Ho Chih Minh City, Vietnam 1996 Spoke on Quantum Chromodynamics at the Quantum Field Theory and High Energy Physics Workshop (QFTHEP96) in St. Petersburg Russia o Learned the lesson of Vodka with a wierd guy from Trinidad and a nutty Belgian woman 1997 Taught relativistic quantum field theory to high school and junior high students o The students nailed it. 1998  Spoke at the XXXIII Rencontres du Moriond confrence on QCD in Les Arcs France o Breakfast 7-9a, talks 9-12, ski 12-5p, talks 5-7p, dinner 7-10p, hang out in the lounge 10-12p, repeat - realized that bruises after skiing are like scratches after sex - they just mean you're doing it right 1999 Director of Advanced Technology, Enhanced Messaging Systems, a wireless-web startup o Worked for a megalomaniac - learned everything I needed to know about business, intellectual property and engineering. o At Scarborough Renaissance Faire, Standing Bear Cooper told me that I am "a portal" o Became “The Stand Man” selling food in the grandstand at high school football games to support the Band Boosters - made a lot of wise cracks, never had my ass kicked, but deserved it. 2000 Spent 4 hours under the bridge in Aberdeen WA where Kurt Cobain composed because it meant something to Heather. I don’t know what. 2001  Scientist, Agilent Technologies, Dallas Texas, part of Agilent’s Field Sales Force 2002 Toured the US giving day-long seminars to engineers on fiber optics 2003 o AFC Championship game: Radiers vs Titans - Metallica showed up on a flatbed truck and played a concert in the parking lot before the game. One of the best days ever. Ever! 2003-2004 Toured the US giving half-day seminars on timing noise (jitter) in high data rate systems 2003  o Searched for the Holy Grail in Cornwall, bought a coffee cup at King Arthur’s birthplace instead 2004  Moved home to California o Driving across the Arizona border, there was a rainbow behind us - I am somewhere over the rainbow o Pub Creep through Petaluma on my birthday 2005  o Visited the tomb of King Arthur, searched for the Holy Grail in Devonshire, Ireland, and Scotland (bought two coffee cups) o Writer, physicist, public speaker, Petaluma California 2006  o At Litquake - natural born MC o Found me a Button and joined that elite club of California real estate owners... 2007 o Ran for Petaluma City Council - humiliating, but amusing and welcome defeat 2008 o Daughter graduated from UC Santa Cruz - meeting the minimum requirement I set for her the day she was born. Felt a cosmic pat on the back. o Stared at the ocean from the deck of a cruise ship for 10 days - it was “swell” 2009 o Uncle Sherman Died (1995-2009) - Uncle Sherman was a wire-haired pointer, well, he was sort of big for a wire-haired pointer, but, of course, he was from Texas. o He was the right dog for the job.Went to the bottom of Baja California to sit in the sand with beer and pelicans o Professor Buckley, Spot-headed Hill Dog, applied for and was granted his position. 2010 o The God Patent was published by Numina Press! Booked the shit out of myself - speeches, readings, interviews... being a rock star is exhausting but wonderful in a sick, twisted way. No wonder they go nuts. 2011 o Cruise to Hawaii with Jim and all of his friends. o Snorkeled around a crater, swam around in the shower of a waterfall, searched high and low for the perfect Mai Tai, can’t beat Big Don’s though - only available in Redding. 2012 o Signed with 47North, the biggest publisher west of I5, owned by the biggest bookseller in the world. Spiked a football. o Spent a night in an Amsterdam coffee shop with his two favorite people in the whole world. They sure talk a lot. o Got a blue Fender Stratocaster for his birthday. 2013 o Got a little girl dog named, Dear Abby. She’s really tiny, almost too tiny, but she buries things and in all other ways resembles a dog. o The God Patent was re-published by a much bigger house, 47North. o The Sensory Deception was published by 47North. o Married Karen Garber on September 21, 2013 (I gotta remember that date). 2014 o Became a bonafide science writers, finally and officially bridging the gap from my high tech work, science, and fiction! o Learned about urban coyotes and haven’t looked at the world the same since. o Had a moment of doubt but can’t recall what it was. 2015 o Paris, it turns out, really is all that. (And the Raider Nation is well represented there. o Wales remains my favorite country (except for home, of course). o Perfectly balanced summer working on PAM4 tech and revising The 99% Solution. 2016 o My first nonfiction book came out from Viva Editions
Ransom Stephens scientist, author, speaker
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